ten.

today I am 34 weeks pregnant. and 10 years without my mom.

yep. 10 years.

I didn't think I would make it here. Once I met someone who's mom had died 10 years prior and I thought, there is no way I will be able to last that long without a mom.

But, here I am. And I feel okay. I feel good. I feel happy. As my baby kicks my ribs to hell, I feel better than I have ever felt before on this day. Obviously, there is a hole in my heart that will never be filled, but the people that have come into my life, (and those who have stayed) over the last ten years have made my life worth living. And I love every single one of them. I just feel insanely blessed. I feel blessed that to be alive and healthy. I feel blessed to have the wonderful family that I have and that I acquired through marriage. I feel blessed that I inherited so many wonderful things from my mother, but that her terrible taste in men wasn't one of them. I am sooo happy with where I am today (and I hope that she is too.) and the number one reason is that I have an incredible husband. And soon, we'll be adding a sweet little baby dude to our crew. (Who I know in my heart has already met my mom.)

As life goes on, you never forget the people that you've lost, and the pain never goes away. But time makes things easier and love makes it possible to go on.

You can see past blogs about my beautiful mom here & here.